Dreams of Heaven By: Stephanie Halvorsen
It’s 3 a.m. on the morning before my first final, I find myself sitting with a blank word document staring back at me. My mind is everywhere but on the topic of the paper I should be writing. I feel totally helpless, completely out of control, vulnerable and unprepared. 45 minutes later, this blank document is still staring at me, I have lost track of time again. I have been lost in thoughts of greater things. Things more important than anything I will face tomorrow or in the next week. Things more important than anything that happened last week or that will happen in the weeks to come.
My thoughts have wandered up to heaven and it’s the hardest thing to bring them back down to earth. My heart is with my Savior. My mind is in a place where time does not exist, where deadlines don’t hang overhead. It is in the place where I can spend eternity living the love story of my King and I. Where I can spend forever just being in His presence. Basking in the unconditional love and acceptance from the God of the universe. He will ask for no term papers, no multiple-choice questions will stare back at me in black and white ink. All He wants to know is how much I love Him, He wants to hear how He has taken my broken life and made it whole, how he is my Superhero and has mended my every broken heart with His perfect love.
No test can compare, nothing I can write in ink is more important; nothing else will last forever except for this: He is everything. The greatest test in history is not given in a classroom, it is not a test you can cram for till the early morning hours. It is a life lived selflessly. A life lived in service to others because of Jesus; A life where every act is total surrender and worship. As final exams draw near, perspective is the gift given me. This is everything: to walk by faith, to live for His glory, and to trust ruthlessly. This entire world and everything in it, is all in His perfect hands.
“When my heart is overwhelmed, lead me to the Rock that is higher than I.”
Psalms 33:11 The Message
martinoutlook said,
May 5, 2009 at 10:36 am
Stephanie, please keep talking to us–we all need to hear what you are saying.
And we’ll try to return the blessing by praying for you as you survive final test week.
How sweet it is to know, as you share here, that the unconditional acceptance of God transcends all the testing we go through on this earth. Not only tests from fellow humans, but God’s own spiritual testing is transcended by His acceptance of us in Christ.
That’s grace made real! I’ll buy it! Oops–it’s a gift. Thanks for reminding us of that!
Pastor Ron Halvorsen Jr said,
May 6, 2009 at 2:07 pm
Thank you Stephanie!
Nothing like some Heavenly perspective to place things in their proper place. I’ve heard the line “so heavenly minded, no earthly good” many times. They may have meant well, but they were wrong. It seems being Heavenly minded brings the best earthly good. Keep on writing. I’m reading.
Love you,
Dad
Myrna said,
May 7, 2009 at 2:20 pm
awesome Steph!! You are an excellent writer.. Love your angle on the greatest test of life!!
I love your words: “to trust ruthlessly”.
What a test indeed!! May I pass that one. Amen
nancyoutlook said,
May 10, 2009 at 10:38 am
Stephanie–A hundred years ago when I was in college I wish my thoughts would have been as heavenly minded as yours. What a blessing you are, I always enjoy reading your messages.
Aron Chilson said,
May 19, 2009 at 11:00 pm
The thing that is the most up lifting about this article for me is that a college student is writing it! There are so many people that I am running into lately that are having “dreams of heaven.” The phrase “As final exams Draw near” Has a prophetic ring to it! I often wonder as adults claiming that the end is near. The coming of our Savior is just around the corner. Why so many of us(myself included) spend so much time and effort in purchasing a new home or remodeling the one we have. Buying brand new cars when the one we have will do the trick with a little maintenance?(It causes me to wonder if my actions are out weighing my words?)
And I for one am getting sick of having to ask myself that question. I am feeling caged and ready for action not just words. And I wonder when I read things by a college student with sentiment like this and the since of urgency that I see in so many people around me. The economy busting at the seams. Friends having interest in Jesus in a way they never have before. And the way the Holy Spirit is net working me with other new believers. New brothers and sisters. I have never experienced anything like this in my life! The Holy Spirit seems to be, being poured out in large measures.
It makes me think, Our “dreams” are about to become REALITY!!!
Buffy Halvorsen said,
May 20, 2009 at 11:48 am
Aron thanks for your comment. You are right! We are all preparing for that final exam every day by who controls our life. I can’t wait for that dream to become reality. It sometimes seems to me like heaven is more real than earth. It is hard to stay focused on earth when heaven is our home.